Closures and Reasons....
I’m a big believer in closures. I
think it’s important that things that have taken its course, whether good or
bad, must be given a proper send off. Not necessarily an end, but an
acknowledged period of transition.
Which is why, even though I could
just stop writing on this blog, and just leave it as it is, I’m going to
formally end it with this post. Even though the small number who reads it, wouldn’t
really mind. I feel it is important for me to give it a proper send off.
When I started this blog, I was
in hindsight, a little bit upset. Through my own careless fault, I was locked
out of another one that I have been writing at for almost a decade. Unprepared
to let go, I just put up this one. In my mind it was a chance for a revamp, a
version 2.0 if you will, I told myself that this was going to be different and
better than the older one.
But here is the thing, ten years
ago when I started writing under the Diplomatic Baggage title, it was a young
newly married girl, excited about starting the life Diplomatic. And no, I did
not have any preconceived notions of what that life is like, in fact I did not
have any idea at all, and that I remembered became my draw, the clueless
misadventures of a young Diplowife.
In this blog, while it didn’t have
the same flow as the former one, I liked that I was able to maintain a certain
voice, the same one that doesn’t do it for traffic or subscribers, plus it gave
me a place to write about a phase I was going through, a change that I felt was
no longer similar to the girl who wrote in the first blog – I was getting
older.
Even a decade before, blogging
was a means that I have always wanted to do, and JG deciding to become a
foreign service officer and being shipped off to places in the world, gave me
an avenue to write about something. Through it I was also able to learn of
others like me, the digital world was a different time then, but its
connectivity still ringed true in helping me find others who also blogged about
their experiences and stories at post.
That’s one of the main reasons why,
I feel that this is right time to stop. The world and the digital space it has
created for someone like me has changed. In case you are not aware, technology
has now made it possible for those who have a lot to share make it even more
interesting, via a more multi-media means.
As time went on, some of the
other Diplowives I followed slowly stopped posting in their blogs. I think
social media got too big, and sharing in small bites, became even more
convenient, rather than sitting down and writing about our days like a journal. Maybe most of them have decided that sharing via IG stories, Facebook, or
wherever is simply easier. Or it could be that some have chosen to take it a
step further and start a YouTube channel instead. This isn’t surprising with
the ease of recording actual videos and editing them into short episodes, it
certainly is the trend now, plus it is definitely the new mass medium today, is
it not?
I thought about trying it too,
you can see my attempts in the video travel blog. But I realized that it isn’t for
me. It takes a different kind of talent to share yourself in front of a camera.
JG and I are too self-conscious to try it, to prove a point, my Mother has a
more natural charisma on video than I do. And looking back, even in college, I
have always seen myself behind the scenes.
I think having such confidence is
important, also in the belief that what you are presenting is, even in a little
sense, an authentic part of who you are. I don't want to force myself into showing someone that isn't really me, just so I can run with the times. I think that it
is very different to share your thoughts with just words, than presenting
yourself in front of a camera. For me it is sort of like, how different it is
to learn something from a news report, or a book, than from learning it from a documentary,
or a movie. They are both visual in nature but has different effects and approaches.
The other main reason is that even
though we are not restricted in any way to keep it within travel and events we
attend, I always tried to remember that because I used my Diplomatic
connections as a theme for my blog, despite my goals to keep it as candid and
as casual as possible, at the back of mind, it represents something that I must
adhere to, a responsibility to write within its connotations; for obvious and
understandable reasons.
Don’t worry, I’m still, and while
the husband remains in this line of work, will remain a Diplowife. I have just
decided to stop writing as one. I mentioned in a previous post, that I have
started to gear towards the term “trailing spouse”. In my first post in this blog, I also wrote
about an academic paper I wrote, on that topic. My respondents were also Diplomat’s
wives who are blogging, but as I did my research for that paper, I sort of
found a personal peace in the idea that there is more to a explore other than being a Diplomat’s wife, and
being a trailing spouse means going beyond that.
And if I am being honest, with
getting older came some doubts about whether I am truly sharing the truths that
I believe in. There are many others like me who does a great job at presenting
the Diplomatic life in the way it should be, but like making a video, I think
that it isn’t something I know how to do. Perhaps the other Diplowives came to the
same conclusion as I did, as I said maybe they just naturally transitioned to other
ways to share their lives. Perhaps they also felt that while we are always supportive
of our partner’s career in the Foreign Service, there are many other avenues
that we can share about us, outside of this community.
For the few who read my blog,
Thank you. There are so much I still want to say, but I feel that this is
enough for now.
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